Friday, July 23, 2021 at 1:53PM
May your cup overflow with
PEACE,
LOVE,
JOY,
and
Pure AWESOMENESS!!!
We are less than 4 weeks away...
Or just a little over 3 weeks away...
Does it seem real to you yet?
That SparkPeople will no longer BE?
August 17th is looming closer & closer by the day!
Some years back I was blogging there... first one main blog for everything; then spin-offs for just things that were focused on ECO-friendly stuff, or my SparkPeopley stuff, and for a 365 daily challenge thing --- I didn't quite get to finishing that. They all pretty much stopped in the fall of 2011. Why?
At first I could not even remember!
Then...
December 2, 2011
Two things happened that day that remain significant in my life.
The first was me getting my very first cellular phone account! I still have that number! I resisted for so long... but life with 6 adult kids was making having only a landline phone more and more challenging; plus I was more actively growing my business away from home. Having a cell phone had become a necessity! And now, in 2021, I don't even have a landline phone & neither do most of the people I know.
My how life changes... in barely 10 years!
The second thing... happened while I was on the phone, making a legal contract with Verizon, so the call was being recorded. The phone I was on had call-waiting, but I kept ignoring the incoming calls. I had one of my daughters with me at the time. She had her own phone then, so I told her to call one of her sisters and find out what was going on. She did.
As I finished the recorded part of my call, I paused it long enough to ask her about what her sister said. Then I calmly asked the person I was talking to if we could finish up the remainder of tasks later - agreed - I hung up that call.
Then I took my daughter's phone and listened to a very dear friend who was with my other daughters tell me that ...
...
...my only surviving son...
...was in an accident...
...he was being life-flighted to a hospital in the city...
...I should just go straight there NOW ...
... and she would work out everything with my girls, my niece & my sister (they lived with us then) and meet us at the hospital as soon as they could!
It was a LONG NIGHT,
a LONG WEEK,
a LONG MONTH,
and a very long year of many, many changes!
And I never went back to those blogs...until now.
So you're not left hanging:
My son, in his little Ford Taurus, was T-Boned by a DUMP-TRUCK (not loaded) estimated to be moving at 45MPH on impact. The little car was shoved over 100 yards into a nearby field.
We lived in a very small town of less than 10,000 people & almost everyone knew everyone.
Over the next few days we heard about the crash from everyone, all stating in one way or another that they didn't see how anyone would have survived it - the car was unrecognizable, just a bunch of crumpled metal. Even the tow-truck owner said that. EMTs extricated the driver with the jaws of life & he was transported to the local hospital where efforts to stabilize him for air-transport began; then they waited for the chopper to come get him.
In the city - at the Level 1 Trauma Center - he was 1 of 2 choppers coming in at the same time - literally one hovering while the other landed & unloaded.
Both were from truck vs car accidents
Both were males
Both had first names that began with the same letter & had just 1 syllable & sounded similar
Both had last names with same initial too!
Both had family members in the same waiting area!
And NO ONE realized this until a staff member came out asking for the family of M--- D. AND EVERYONE STOOD UP!
It was confusing & frustrating at the time, but one of the lighter moments of the next week or so... for both families.
For my son - he arrived - was quickly assessed & we got a few minutes with him before the first of many surgeries began.
For the other young man - it was similar for his family. He was able to go home 4 or 5 days later.
My son had 3 surgeries lasting into the early morning hours and was in a coma for the next 5 days. A week in ICU. A week in a regular room. A week & a half in rehab. 4 days home. Another week & a half back in the hospital in a regular room - due to blood clots in his lungs. From January to April he was home and we were driving twice each week into the city for more rehab therapies.
When he was first awake he had very little memory - struggled to recall his own name. But in time that improved - to a point. A year later he still could not recall much beyond age 10 or 11. He was 20 - had graduated high school with honors - loved playing football & was really good at it - excelled in math & all things related to numbers - and loved cooking & experimenting with foods. This accident left him devastated & depressed. From May to August we worked at finding the right program to continue his healing.
The more we sought help for him, the more we realized we did not have the means to pay for it! The brain injury also left him dealing with hard to control emotions, which made life at home even more challenging. Ultimately we decided on a program at the University of Wisconsin in Green Bay (about 3 hours driving, from home) that was willing to take him in as a regular student based on grades prior to the accident and work with him remedially to see if he could "catch up" again. That first year was "touch & go" by anyone's standards! More than once, we ALL wanted to quit - and just bring him back home as he was! But we didn't - we all worked together to help him stay involved.
He spent 5 years there - went from C's & D's in the first semester to all A's in his last semester. He was able to do a season with the GB Packers, working with the team's nutritionist. He advanced through various levels of Student Ambassador ~ Advisor ~ Counselor ~ and so on. He earned 2 degrees (Dietitic Nutrition & Physical Therapy)!!! Went on to post-grad studies in Ohio for 2 years! And he is now working full-time as a Registered Dietitian Nutritionist where he also provides guidance on physical fitness.
Oh, and he's married now too! 
There are still years of his childhood he does not remember & returning to the area he grew up can still be traumatic as he can run into old friends who remember him but he has no clue who they are.
One of the lessons here is this: LIFE GOES ON
We can either choose to mourn the changes & losses ~ perhaps indefinitely
Or we can choose to GO ON and see what exciting things could be happening in the future!
Change is hard!
Loss is hard!
Moving on is hard!
We all do HARD THINGS all the time, really! It's just some things are harder for others than for us; and some things are harder for us than for others.
We can choose!
We can choose to do the hard things now & see what we can turn those into in our future!
We can choose to just sit it out; wait until there is no choice left & see what happens.
Doing nothing is easy,
That's why so many people do it.
BUT ~ ~ ~
Marriage is hard, Divorce is hard, Choose your hard.
Obesity is hard. Being fit is hard. Choose your hard.
Being in debt is hard, Being financially disciplined is hard, Choose your hard.
Communication is hard, Not communicating is hard. Choose your hard.
LIFE will NEVER be EASY.
IT will ALWAYS be HARD.
BUT we can choose our hard!
CHOOSE WISELY!!!
